


Won't You Hold Me?

by sleepingneko



Category: AKB48, Majisuka Gakuen 3 - Fandom, SKE48
Genre: sleepingneko
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-30
Updated: 2016-11-06
Packaged: 2018-05-04 04:42:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 9,026
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5320877
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sleepingneko/pseuds/sleepingneko
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>All Yuria ever wanted was to be held by her mother. (How it all began)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> It's been a hell of a ride, but I've finally finished it. Just a note, I did some minor adjustments to the first 3 chapters. And some of you may notice that Chapter 4 has a different writing style to it.
> 
> It's been years after all, I had some trouble replicating how I wrote the other parts. I can only hope that it came out better in the end? I remember getting some good feedback years ago when this first came out. And now that we're at the end of the ride(finally), I hope to hear from everyone who took the time to revisit this fic and finally find closure on the ending lol. No really. 
> 
> I put a lot of thought and emotion into this, please let me know what you think? Both good and bad. Feedback is always welcome. Thanks for reading.
> 
> And for all you little critters who have been waiting since the very beginning, thanks so much for sticking with me till the end! Neko, out! XD

She remembered the times when her mother used to smile. A smile of pure joy, not evil, nor scheming like it is now.

But that was a long time ago.

Even then, it was never directed at her.

Never.

Instead, her elder brother was the object of all her mother's affections. Not that Peace could blame her of course.

He was smart and polite.

He was kind and gentle.

He was obedient and cheerful.

But most of all......

He was everything she wasn't.

Isn't.

Even after all this time, she still could not measure to his level.

Could not make her mother proud.

Could not make her mother love her.

Yuichi would always get praised for his achievements and kind deeds. While little incompetent Yuria was cast aside.

Oh, don't get the wrong idea.

Her every need was catered for. She was given an education, fed, clothed and stayed with her family.  
But what she really wanted, needed, was denied from her.

Her mother's love.

Even so, no matter how much she may have wanted to, she could never hate her brother. He was always kind to her, such as remembering her birthdays and getting her gifts. He seemed to understand her situation, and comforted her about it.

"Don't worry," he said

"Mother loves you very much, she just doesn't show it."

"But she always treats you better. She SHOWERS you with her love. Admit it, she loves you more than me." Yuria retorted.

For that, her brother had no answer.

Yuria looked down in silence, pain clouding her eyes.

"Here," Yuichi held something out to her.

She accepted the candy, and looked questioningly at him.

"Sweet things always help people feel better." He answered with a smile.

She popped it into her mouth when he looked encouragingly at her.

"How is it? Good?" He asked.

"Uhn! It’s delicious." She felt herself smile a little.

Perhaps it was then that it started.

She didn't mean to really. It was a series of events which eventually led up to that moment. Ever since she was young, she had no friends and was always bullied. Being the peaceful person that she is, she ignored her bullies and got used to being alone.

But puberty was taking its toll on her, and things were already hard enough without her mother's care to guide her. Yuichi, being the understanding brother that he is, tried to ease her through it.  
He knew that the depression and stress from peer pressure were the norm in this period of self-discovery.

She was 13, maybe 14 when it happened.

She was on her way home from school, using the route she usually took.

As she was walking through an empty park, two girls appeared and dragged her into the bushes. It all happened so fast, she didn't have time to react properly. When she regained her bearings, she found herself in a secluded area, surrounded by yankees.

They jeered at her and crowded in. She was used to this, it was a normal occurence. The rowdy bunch jostled and pushed her around in the circle. One of them wrestled Yuria’s bag from her and dumped its contents onto the ground  
.  
"Ehhhh? There's only books in here. Such a boring person."

The others laughed at her statement.

"Where's the money?!" Someone shouted.

Yuria hesitated, her allowance was set monthly. If she lost it all now, she wouldn't be able to buy lunch for two more weeks. Her mother would not give her more if she asked, but if she didn't give the money, the yankees would hurt her. Yuria bit her lip, the conflict of her indecision showing on her face.

Deciding that she was taking too long, the leader, a short haired high-schooler with red highlights, signaled to one of the girls. Poor Yuria was surprised as someone restrained her from behind, this had never happened before.

Fear flashed through her eyes as the leader approached. Her heart beating fast while she tried not to panic.

Yuria was too afraid to protest as she was patted down. After a quick search through her pockets, the leader finally found her wallet.

She held Yuria's chin with her free hand and looked into her eyes. Yuria trembled when faced with the fierce yankee.

"Next time don't be so slow when giving us your money." The leader spoke dangerously.

She added a slap for good measure, smirking when she saw the fear on Yuria's face. As she walked away to examine the wallet's contents, Yuria was thrown to the ground where she was kicked repeatedly.

She could do nothing but curl up into a ball, her arms trying to protect her head.

Tears flowed from her eyes as she tried to endure the pain.

"Enough!" The leader's order rang out.

The yankees obediently stepped back, making way for their leader.  
She threw the empty wallet at Yuria, and said.

"Thanks for the money, we'll be back for more later."

One of the girls spoke up.

"That'll take a while, I heard she has problems with her mother."

Other's joined in, laughing at Yuria.

"That's right! Apparently her brother's really talented while she's just a good-for-nothing."

"Haha! No wonder your mother doesn't like you. Compared to him, you're nothing!"  
"Ne...does she even care?"

"I'm not surprised, who would love someone like you?"

As they made to leave, something snapped in Yuria.

She clenched her fists and stared angrily at their retreating backs. Red hot fury, unlike anything she'd ever felt before burned within her.

She leaped towards one of them, who was caught completely unprepared.

For the first time ever, Yuria punched someone.

And it felt good.

The next thing she knew, she was fighting them.

Peaceful, lonely Yuria was fighting her bullies. She then realised that she had a knack for this. Her body ducked and weaved through their attacks naturally. Everytime she was hit, she would return the favour. Yuria was surprised that she'd last this long.

But of course the moment she thought that, someone's punch knocked her to the ground. The yankees immediately kicked at her, not giving her the opportunity to rise.  
When they were done, Yuria couldn't move an inch.

She finally managed to roll onto her back, and groaned as her body protested. She lay there until her brother phoned her.

He was worried since she wasn't home yet, asking her where she was.  
Yuria hung up once she reiterated what happened to him, omitting the fact that she got into a fight. She didn't want him to worry after all.

But as she stared at the night sky, Yuria smiled.

She had finally found something she was good at.


	2. Chapter 2

Shouts filled the air.

Yuria spotted someone approaching quickly on her right.She spun around to smoothly deliver a left hook.

A fist to her face soon followed, but she ducked in time and gave a jab to the stomach in return. The gang of yankees had returned as promised.

But this time, Yuria was prepared.

Since that day, she had never backed down from a fight. By some coincidence or luck, all of her previous brawls were either one-on-ones or against a group of no more than 3 to 6 people. It provided the perfect opportunity for her to discover her potential and hone her skills.

She had some trouble at first, as to be expected.

But Yuria actually had a sharp mind and picked things up quickly. Such as timing her movements and understanding the enemy's own. She had good instincts and soon learned the best ways to deliver a punch or kick.

A few more skirmishes here and there later taught her to recognise how someone was going to attack her beforehand. From there, it was all about becoming stronger physically and having a fast reaction rate.

All her training led to this day. 

This particular gang of yankees had heard about her sudden battle prowess. With them being the yankees that once beat her up, they were filled with confidence and decided to put her in her place.

Which was actually just what she was waiting for.

Yuria had welcomed the challenge with a smirk, eager to test herself. This would be the first time since acquiring her new skills that she would be up against such a large number of people.  
If likened to a game, this would be the boss battle.

To her it was a test to measure herself.

To prove to everyone that she wasn't weak.

That she was worth something.

That she was here, and proud of it.

It took longer than usual, what with the large amount of people to beat. All at once, might I add.

Yuria delivered the final punch, and the leader collapsed, out cold before she even hit the ground. She was exhausted, and worse for wear, but in the end, she was the last one standing.

Yuria straightened and looked at the evening sky, it seemed like the sun would set soon. A breeze swept by and she closed her eyes to enjoy it.

Inhaling deeply, she felt a sense of fulfillment.

A smile graced her features.

She had finally beaten her tormentors.

She had fought back and won.

She was strong.

She was free.

No longer will she have to put up with bullies.

No longer will they make fun of incompetent little Yuria.

She opened her eyes as a voice called her name.

It was Yuichi.

He ran up to her, and paused at the scene. Her brother seemed shocked at what he found. But he disregarded it for now to check on his sister. He placed his hands on her arms, looking at her injuries.

"You're hurt!" He exclaimed.

"It's okay." She answered.

"Nii-chan, I won. See?" Yuria gestured proudly to the unconscious girls lying scattered around them.

Instead of praising her, Yuichi shook her by the shoulders.

"What were you thinking?! You could have gotten yourself killed!"

Yuria brushed his hands off and pouted.

"They would have done so if I didn't fight back anyway. At least this way, I'm safe and they're the ones who should be scared."

Her brother frowned.

"Yuria, stop this. It's not like you. Getting into fights? Beating up yankees? You have no idea how shocked I was when I heard what you've been doing."

This time it was Yuria's turn to frown. She never bragged about her triumphs. Not that she had anyone to brag to.

"How did you find out?"

"Don't you know? Rumours about you streetfighting are flying all around the neighbourhood lately."

Yuria was taken aback by that news. Apparently, her reputation had already grown faster than she expected. 

And it will only continue once people find out about today's events.

Yuichi continued speaking.

"But that's beside the point. Enough of this, I don't want you to fight anymore."

Anger boiled within Yuria.

She shoved her brother backwards, shocking him.

What happened to his gentle little sister?

"Shut up!! You're just jealous because I'm finally better than you at something." Yuria shouted with clenched fists.

"Yuria-chan, that's not..."

"You don't understand how it feels!" She interrupted.

"Always being ignored, and being pushed around by bullies that do notice you..."

"Yuria..."

"I'm finally good at something! I even beat them! I'm finally free. Is that so bad?" She broke down into sobs, all her pent up feelings breaking through.

Yuichi embraced her, holding her tight and stroking her hair. She didn't fight back, and accepted his hug.

"Yuria, forgive me." He whispered.

"I know it's been tough for you, but I just don't want anything bad to happen because you've been picking fights."

Yuria broke free from his hold and wiped away her tears.

"Nii-chan, you don't understand. I never started any of them. I've only been defending myself."

"What?" Her brother was confused.

"I mean...I HAVE been fighting. But that was only to defend myself. I don't do it unless they attack first."

"Really?" He looked searchingly at her.

"Uhn!" Yuria nodded in affirmation.

He sighed, somewhat relieved.

"Well, I guess that's okay then. Even if I'm still worried about you."

Yuria beamed at him and enveloped him in another tight hug.

"Come on, let's get you cleaned up."

He steered her in the direction of their home, just glad that she was still in one piece. A thought struck him whilst walking. He looked at her and voiced it out loud.

"Ne, since you've already built a reputation for yourself, does that mean you have a street name?"

Yuria looked quizzically back at him.

"A street name?"

"You know, like the ones that yankees or street fighters have. An alias."

"Oh...No, I don't have one.

Yuichi looked at the orange sky, as if the answer was somehow hidden there.

"Hmmmm...then from now on, I'll call you Peace."

"Peace?" Yuria was perplexed by the odd choice of name.

"Mhm!" He nodded, immensely pleased with his choice.

Her brother looked meaningfully at her.

"Because from now on, if you have to fight, I want you to do it only for peace. Okay?"

Yuria blinked in response. She was surprised by his deep answer. Warmth filled her as she realised just how much he cared for her.

This wonderful, kind brother of hers.

"I understand, Nii-chan."


	3. Chapter 3

"Yuria!

Upon hearing her name, she stopped by the landing of the staircase. Her mother approached from the living room with a disapproving look on her face.

"Where have you been? Look at you! Have you been fighting again?!"

Yuria kept her eyes trained on the floor, she always hated this part of the day.

"It's late, and you're a mess. What on earth are you thinking? Getting into fights? Haven't you shamed us enough?!"

She bit her lip, and clenched her fists, trying to bear through her mother's lecture. Really, if she was so tired of it, then why did it still hurt so much?

'Just a little longer, it's almost over.' She thought to herself.

'You can deal with it, just don't break down.'

"Look at me when I'm talking to you! Honestly, try learning some manners from your brother. I don't understand why he can be such a good child while you're the complete opposite."

Yuria, to her own disdain, flinched at those words. Knowing that she struck a nerve, her mother continued.

"Do you know what happens to girls like you? They get thrown into prison! And then what will you do?"

Wait.

Yuria looked up, surprised. Hope shone in her eyes. Was her mother actually worried about her?

"And what about me? I deal with yankee girls everyday, what will my employers think if my own daughter gets thrown into prison?!

Oh.....  
Of course, she should have known. Yuria lowered her gaze and held back a sigh.

"You will stop with this nonsense immediately. If you're really in need of a hobby, go do something useful for once. But I will not have my daughter running around soiling the family name. This is your final warning. Am I clear?!"

Managing a small nod, it was all Yuria could do to keep herself together. Once her mother's back was turned she took this chance to run to her room. Making sure the door was locked, she took a moment to scoff at herself for not slamming it, since she knew her mother disliked the action.

Throwing herself onto the bed, the tears that were held back burst past her control as she buried her face into her pillow.

Why can't she amount to something?

Why was nothing that she did ever good enough?

Why did she even care what her mother thought?

As these thoughts ran amok in her mind, Yuria tried to hold back her screams of frustration.

  
She was angry at her mother for not loving her, for not understanding.

And she was angry at herself for caring. She should have been used to it by now, she should have accepted that she'd never amount to anything in her mother's eyes. So why? WHY?!

And Yuichi, why did he have to be so perfect? Of all people, why did HE have to be her brother?

No.

Yuria berated herself, how could she think that? He was nothing but kind to her. It wasn't his fault that things turned out this way. If anything, she's grateful that he was there for her. The one anchor that kept her from drifting into a sea of depression and oblivion. It was wrong to be angry at him.

She was startled out of her reverie by the sound of knocking on her door.

"Peace? It's me, can I come in?"

Not wanting to deal with anyone at the moment, Yuria kept silent, and tried to ignore his pleas.

"I heard what happened downstairs. Could you please let me in?"

Heaving a sigh, Yuria wiped her tears away and pulled herself together before opening the door. Once Yuichi entered, he ushered her to sit on the bed after locking the door behind him.

Settling down next to her, he noticed how downcast she was, refusing to look up at him. Without any hesitation, he drew her into his arms, surprising her with the sudden act.  
Firmly, he told her,

"I'm always here if you need me."

Her guilt ate away at her. Once again, this selfless brother of hers was being so kind. As if her guilt were some sort of key, it unlocked the dam of emotions she had been trying to keep under control. Tears sprang forth again, she cried into his shoulder.

Yuichi patiently kept her company, stroking her hair while whispering again and again that it was going to be alright. Once she had quieted down, he pulled back to find that Yuria had cried herself to sleep.

Giving a sad smile, he tucked her into bed and sat there for a while. He liked how peaceful she looked as she slept. A moment when she could forget all about her pain and troubles. Brushing her hair from her eyes, he wished her sweet dreams before planting a kiss on her temple.

Right before he turned out the lights, he looked back at his little sister, and earnestly prayed for her to live a happy life, with or without him.

 

\--------------------------------------------------------------------

Two days later, Yuria was keeping true to her word. Even though she never instigated any fights, she also made sure to give no opportunity for others to start one with her. So right now, she was watching the clouds drift by, wondering just why she was still trying to please her mother.

This was her favourite spot, a little hill hidden from the world, yet not too far from home. Eventually, after much brooding, she concluded that no matter how much she hated the way she was treated, she still loved her mother.

Why? Yuria guessed that because she never really felt her love, it only fueled her yearning for it. After all, no matter what, she was still her mother. She had nurtured and raised her since birth. Huffing at her sense of loyalty and fidelity, she lamented over the fact that her mother didn't even realise it.

'Sweet things always make people feel better.'

Ah, that's right. For some reason, her brother's words sprang into her mind. Shrugging and thinking to herself why not, she decided to pay a visit to a favourite dessert store of hers. She could definitely use some chocolate right now.

Her trip to the store was uneventful, unfortunately, the same could not be said as she was returning home.

Yuria was taking her usual route, happily munching on the last of her chocolate bar, when a couple of girls emerged from the corner and blocked her way.

"Look at you, all smiles with not a care in the world."

'That's not true.' Yuria thought.

But she recognised who was speaking, it was a girl who she defeated last week. Apparently, she was the teppen of her school, though Yuria couldn't exactly remember her name

The girl continued.

"I hate it when little nobody's get all cocky thinking they own the place."

"I never thought that at all, and you were the one who started attacking me." Yuria retorted.

"Shut your mouth!" A vein could be seen popping from her temple.

"We're gonna make you disappear!"

"Sorry, I'd rather not."

Yuria instantly turned around to flee, but found that her escape route was blocked by three more girls.

'Darn it, I was so close.' She felt irritated that these prideful girls had to hinder her promise to Yuichi.

A girl to Yuria's right sprang forward with her fist raised. She blocked the punch and retaliated with a menacing left hook.

Later, Yuria cautiously opened the front door and tip-toed up the stairs. The last thing she wanted was to be caught by her mother yet again. Of course, with her luck, she was almost home-free when a voice rang out.

"Peace!"

  
'Damnit,' she thought.

She sheepishly descended the steps, sporting a nervous smile from being caught.

"Tadaima, onii-chan."

Yuichi frowned instead.

"You're hurt,"

"A-ah....it's not as bad as it looks..." Yuria fidgeted and touched her bleeding lip, trying not to hiss at the sting.

"Even so. Come on, let's get you cleaned up."

He gently tended to her cut lip and other injuries, telling her that their mother would be back late that night, and kept prodding her on what happened earlier.

Once she had explained, the only thing Yuichi did was tell her that dinner was waiting for them.

And that's how they ended up having dinner together, an unnatural silence between the two. Yuichi's face was pensive but did not give Yuria any hints on what was plaguing her brother so much.

She knew that it would have something to do with her. After all, his silence only began after she had spun her tale.

Yuria was curious and anxious, but she held herself back, knowing that Yuichi would tell her when he was ready. And she was right. He only spoke up later, once the dishes were cleaned, and gently led her to sit on the sofa.

"Peace," he started, not unkindly, his eyes serious and unyielding.

"We both know that this current situation is not working out. Instead of people avoiding you, they're now drawn to the prospects of defeating a well-known fighter."

"But onii-chan!" Yuria interrupted,  
"It's not like I get in trouble on purpose!"

"I know," Yuichi said, he placed both hands on her shoulders, calming her down.

"You do it to protect yourself, because you refused to be bullied anymore. It's admirable, and praiseworthy, but at a price. People are attracted to power Peace, and you're caught in the middle of it."

"But I'm not a yankee!" Yuria protested, grasping onto one of Yuichi's arms.

"That's exactly it!" He deadpanned.

"To them, you're no rebellious school delinquent, or some fearsome street gangster, you're a meek, quiet, lonely goody two-shoes! Don't you see? You're the perfect target."

Yuria kept quiet, her gaze downcast, she knew that her brother's words rang true.

"Those that don't know you challenge you, and those you've beaten, come back. They're relentless! That's why you keep getting into fights despite trying to avoid them. And as long as this continues, you'll always be at odds with mother."

"Then tell me, what should I do?!" Yuria pleaded, tears prickling at her eyes.

She was sick of this, there was no pleasing anyone. If she did not fight back, she'd be bullied aggressively like before. But if she retaliated, she suffered the wrath of her mother.

It was one or the other.

Yuria was angry, just so frustrated that she had run into another brick wall. Why was it so hard just for her to be happy? Wasn't it bad enough to have no friends? Like her brother had said, she was lonely. Oh so lonely.

"Listen, I did some research, and may have found a solution. Before you decide, I want you to think it over carefully ok?" Yuichi gingerly handed her a pamphlet, his eyes watching her closely as she examined it.

Yuria was shocked, she didn't know how to react.

It was a pamphlet for an all girl's boarding school. Its pages displayed information and images of smiling high school girls, with modern school facilities and picturesque surroundings.

In another prefecture.

"It's in another prefecture, I know. But that's the point, it's far enough for you not to be recognised and has a low crime rate, so there's less risk of you getting in trouble with yankees. You could have a fresh start, make friends, and live without mother breathing down your neck."

Yuria didn't answer, she could barely breathe. Yuichi's words struck deep. She could live the life she always wanted. Finally be happy. It seemed too good to be true.

And then she remembered, it was.

"But Onii-chan, that far? What about you? I can't do it without you....."

And it was true. Her brother was the only support she had ever known, she depended on him emotionally and mentally, she can't leave someone that important behind.

To leave to an unknown school, in an unknown town, located in a faraway prefecture, all without her one comfort and anchor to this world? Unthinkable.  
Knowing what she was thinking, Yuichi enveloped her into a hug. A long, warm, comforting hug, that allowed Yuria to wrap her arms around such an important figure in her life, and thank whichever powers that may be for granting her at least this one piece of happiness.

They both savoured the moment, knowing that their time left together was limited. The world keeps spinning, and it just so happened that it was spinning Yuria in a different direction than her beloved brother.

When they finally separated, Yuichi grasped his sister by the shoulders and looked her seriously in the eye.

"You are stronger than you think you are, Peace. Both physically and mentally. You fought back against the bullies that have tormented you for so long. Not many have the strength to do so. You endured for so long....." Yuichi took a deep breath, saddened by the thought that he could not do much more for Yuria.  
That he could not protect her from harm, forcing her to fend for herself.

"Onii-chan...." Yuria stared up at her brother, not knowing where this was going, and at a loss for words.

"But remember that being strong comes with a price. Even if you move, there might still be chances for you to somehow get into fights. I know you've been struggling with the promise to not fight, and I hate seeing you hurt. But if it is better than the alternative....well, at least mother won't be there to find out. My only wish is that you wield that strength responsibly, for peace, ne?" Yuichi gave a small encouraging smile.

Yuria blinked uncomprehendingly for a while.

A wide smile slowly grew on her face, and she tackled Yuichi into another tight hug.

"Hai!"

Things were looking up. Maybe, just maybe, she will finally be happy.


	4. Chapter 4

Part 4

 

Things were looking up, Yuichi had helped persuade their mother into letting Yuria attend the boarding school. The fact that she'll be too far away for the neighbours to see her sully the family name, seemed like a great reason for her mum.

Yuria thought about it bitterly, but shrugged it off. She was now in class after all. Her new classmates were eager to meet the cutely shy, quiet transfer. Something that she was glad for. She was well in her way of making friends, though there was no one she considered close yet.

But it was a start. 

Yuria smiled at that thought.

.......................................................................................................

 

It had been weeks, and Yuria had not punched anyone since moving. She was laughing at some joke with her classmates, when her phone rang. Confusion and dread filled her as she tentatively answered. Why was her mother suddenly calling? 

Her heart practically stopped, and her eyes widened in shock when her mother's voice came through.

"Yuichi's dead. Come home immediately."

The phone clattered against the floor.

......................................................................................................

 

It was a depressing affair, many had come to the funeral. Relatives, friends, anyone who knew Yuichi. It was clear to all that he was well loved. And yet, Yuria thought angrily, in the face of all this love, how could he commit suicide? How dare he, compared to what she had to go through, leave her just as things were getting better.

She had withdrawn from school indefinitely to assist her grieving mother. Night after night, she fell asleep to her mother's wails.

It was taking its toll on her, but there was nothing she could do.

"They'll pay for this. Scum like them should be wiped clean!"

Her mother's cries of agony steadily grew into a cry of vengeance.

"We know who did it but they are escaping justice."

"They will be punished!"

Yuria didn't know what to do, her mother's words were beginning to scare her. While her mother plotted and schemed in her home office, everything to do with the house upkeep was left to Yuria.

She dutifully carried out her chores, cooking, cleaning, doing the laundry and caring for her mum.

And so it happened that she was walking home with groceries for dinner when her path was blocked. Of course, this just had to happen. She was still grieving for Yuichi, couldn't they just give her a break?!

"The famous Peace has come home!"

"Welcome back loser!"

Yuria rolled her eyes at their lame taunts.

"I'm not in the mood to deal with you desperate small fry. Come challenge me in a few days." She attempted to walk past but they held their ground.

"Oh yes, tragic news, about your brother."

"Still in mourning?"

"Yes, now get out of my way." Yuria hissed through gritted teeth. 

"This wouldn't have happened if he had listened to us you know."

Yuria stopped dead in her tracks, it felt like her heart had skipped a beat.

"W-what?"

The yankees laughed at her reaction.

"You heard me, we needed a lackey and he fit the role so well."

"All he needed to do was to buy stuff for us, maybe even steal some."

"We figured since you were such a pushover that your brother would be the same."

"But he refused and kept avoiding us, how rude."

Their laughter filled her ears, her fists clenched and once again, Yuria saw red.

"And that night?" She growled, Yuria didn't need to elaborate, they knew what she was talking about.

The night of Yuichi's death.

"Well, we were teaching him a lesson....accidents DO happen." The leader shrugged carelessly.

She was down with a single punch.

In a split second, Yuria had dropped her groceries and lunged at the leader. She missed someone coming from her right, and got hit in the face. But before she could retaliate, a shout from across the street halted her.

"You girls! What do you think you're doing?!"

"Shit! That old hag is gonna call the police!" The yankees panicked and picked up their leader before hurrying away.

Calming from her anger, Yuria realised what had happened and immediately bowed in thanks to the woman who had helped her. She refused the need to lodge a police report and assured her that she was fine.

Yuria gathered her things and hurried home, slamming the door behind her in relief.

Much to her surprise, her mother emerged from the office and gave her a once over.

"You were fighting again."

"I’m sorry." Yuria couldn't say anything else, she looked away, unable to meet her mother's gaze.

"It's bad enough that my son is dead, but for my daughter to be like the very people who took him away from me?" Her mother shook her head in disgust.

A simple statement, but it cut deeper than any knife could have.

“And the police, incompetent beer-bellied fools!” She ranted on.

“Yuichi would never commit suicide! How dare they ignore me? A mother knows her son best!” Her mother turned her back on Yuria and returned to her office.

“No matter, those girls will pay the price soon enough. Yuichi will have his revenge. I’ll make sure of it.”

The slamming of the door did nothing to help the chill Yuria felt up her spine.

Day by day the ravings got worse. She hurried to the kitchen and tried to ignore the crazy ramblings. But as she started on dinner she couldn’t help thinking of the yankees. Was it really madness?

 

 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

It had been a week since her mother’s outburst. Things seemed to have calmed down since then, the ramblings lessening until it stopped completely. Her mother never looked angrily at her anymore. Instead, she was graced with a calm indifference, keeping their interaction to a minimum. 

She should feel relieved, she should revel in the unexpected calm.

It might have been her instinct, honed after years of mistreatment.

That prickling at the base of her skull couldn’t be ignored.

Something was wrong. 

She descended the stairs, and happened to meet her mother who just left the home office. Her eyes quickly examined her from head to toe before meeting Yuria’s. For some reason they locked her into place, their gaze boring right through her.

“What a waste of your talents.” Yuria was beyond confused as her mother walked off in disdain.

Talents? Since when did she do anything of note? But most of all, did her mother just admit that she was talented? All sorts of questions began ringing in her head, and they only got louder with each passing day.

The more time passed, the more confused Yuria felt. She was getting mixed signals from her mother. The fact that she was the receiving end of anything but disdain was a feat in itself.

It had been a couple of months since Yuichi’s death, her mother had stopped wailing into the night. Instead, she seemed to be busying herself with a project. Muttering to herself as she read over files, endless hours on phone calls to people with titles such as Commissioner, Chief, Senator, and Warden. 

Yuria would try to listen in sometimes, hearing snatches of conversation as she delivered food to her mother. She didn’t manage to glean much, often being shooed out and having the door closed in her face. Yuria could only guess that it was more prison work. For the most dangerous of people. The girl shuddered at the thought. All the most threatening criminals in one place? What a nightmare.

But that wasn’t the worst part. Now and then, her mother would throw her…..looks. That’s all Yuria could describe. It was a queer look, one that sent alarms ringing in her head. Ironically she had wished her whole life for maternal attention. Yet when it finally happened, Yuria wished to be ignored more than ever.

It always seemed like her mother was planning something. And now when she looked at Yuria, it seemed like she was somehow throwing her into the equation. Why? The yankee wondered. Why the secrecy and the looks? Why the little smirks when she thought no one was looking? Why the sudden attention? 

It was only when it was too late that Yuria realized why things felt off. Because despite all the weirdness and suspicious behavior, she felt hope.

 

\-------------------------------------------------------

 

One evening, Yuria came back bruised but otherwise unharmed. She had been ambushed by Yankees yet again. She DID try to avoid them, nevertheless emerging victorious when they converged on her. She entered the house and rolled her shoulders with a sigh, hearing a few satisfying pops. 

Yuria froze when she saw a figure at the end of the hallway. It was her mother. She was caught fighting AGAIN. Damnit.

Her mother’s face was neutral, but her eyes were calculating as she gave Yuria a once over.

“The local Yankees are no match for you huh?” Her mother said, slowly walking forward.

“I-It wasn’t my fault. I didn’t go looking for trouble.” Yuria defended, almost instinctively backing away. The girl had to steel herself to meet those eyes. And she could barely do so.

“That doesn’t matter. Silly girl. You still don’t understand do you?” Her mother scoffed, stopping a few feet away.

Yuria was confused, looking up at the woman with furrowed brows. Her heart was beating quickly, this was highly unusual. Something about the situation scared her. 

Her mother rolled her eyes, hand snapping out to grip Yuria’s face almost painfully. The girl gasped in surprise, flinching as fingers dug into her cheek and their eyes locked.

“YOU’RE the one with the power. They should fear YOU.” Her mother’s gaze bore into her own, intense and furious, almost maniacal.

Yuria tried pulling away, hands pushing as she protested.

But the woman would have none of it, shaking her and gripping her face tighter.

“Listen to your mother!” A pause. Her eyes….softened?

Yuria was beyond confused. She was bewildered.

“My little girl….so much power. It pains me to see you waste it.” The grip loosened, and a hand tenderly caressed her face.

Losing her breath, Yuria could have sworn her heart stopped. Tears pooled in her eyes, confounding and frustrating the girl.

Why?! After all this time.

Why?! She had already resigned herself to never being loved.

Why?! Why did she feel happy?!

“Justice is important, my dear. And only those with power are able to dispense it.” With that, her mother withdrew back into herself, turning away and retreating to the home office. She cast one last look over her shoulder.

“Do me a favour, and don’t waste your talents.” She left Yuria rooted by the door, wondering what the hell just happened.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------ 

 

Yuria spent quite a few restless nights after that day. There’s was no denying it. As much as it disgusted her. The way her mother looked at her. Yuria felt her heart soar. Accompanied by disgust from the pit of her stomach. How could she feel glad?! The woman had never cared for her. She would always…always love…..Yuria shook her head and refused to finish that thought.

Nevertheless, things had changed. If things were different now, that means her mother had changed too right? Could she really, finally be on the receiving end of her affections?

Yuria had to reassess everything she knew about her mother. She didn’t want to cling onto false hope. The girl had to remind herself time and time again about the dangers of being disappointed. But this was why she hated herself so much.

Because no matter what, no matter how many times she was let down, Yuria would always, almost indefinitely seek her mother’s approval. Her love.

She craved being loved. She was so starved of it. And she loathed the fact. The never ending cycle of emotions plagued Yuria, and she would often stare into space.

Yuria would stare at the ceiling, stare at the clouds, stare at the moon, the stars, people, the picture of her and Yuichi. Sweet, kind Yuichi.

The brother who deserved so much more.

The void that his lack of presence left was crippling. In the days after his funeral, Yuria had felt so empty. That was probably why she wholeheartedly threw herself into caring for her mother and running the house. Why she didn’t respond to her worried friends in the wonderful new school.

The school Yuuichi had found for her. The friends Yuuichi had helped her make. She couldn’t bring herself to see them. To even think of them. It hurt too much. All it did now was remind her of the void. All it did was drown her in guilt. How could she enjoy her life at the expense of his?

‘How can I let myself be happy, when he’s dead?’

Yuria hugged her pillow tighter, burying her face and tears in it. Perhaps this was the best punishment for her.

 

\---------------------------------------------

 

On that fateful night, it was quieter than usual. A heavy storm sent most everyone running home, leaving the streets desolate and lonely. But Yuria was hungry, too hungry to think straight. After that day, her mother had gone back to her reclusive plotting self, which meant there would be no help with housework from her. Which was fine for Yuria, it was a welcome distraction.

Once the storm had died down, leaving only brief showers of rain and moderately strong wind, Yuria decided that enough was enough. She was getting food.

Abandoning the idea of an umbrella, Yuria wrapped herself in a warm hoodie and rain-jacket, braving the outdoors for the sake of nourishment. She looked forward to a hot cup of ramen.

The girl made her way to the nearest convenience store, dodging fallen trees and mounds of debris. Her hands shoved into her pockets for warmth, she was already shivering when the bright lights of the store hit her. A soft beep greeted her as the electronic doors opened, and she stepped inside for some much needed warmth.

Yuria picked her cup ramen quickly and decisively, bagging a few for home. She paid for her purchase, eagerly preparing two cups for herself. The girl found a seat by the window counter, hands clasped around the hot cups of noodles with relief.

She ate to her hearts content, taking her time and spending little more than a half hour by herself. As she devoured her noodles, Yuria thought she saw a figure outside, in the corner of her eye. But when she looked again there was no one there. It was dismissed as a trick of the mind, nothing more.

The walk home was about as quiet as the journey to the convenience store. Frogs were croaking, owls had come out of hiding, but strong gusts of wind still blew. A warning that more rain is still to come. Yuria’s breath misted in the cold night air, the flickering streetlights the only things helping her vision.

She stopped walking and blinked at the sign. She tilted her head at the road block. It seems that a tree had fallen further up the road. But wasn’t it clear when she walked through here earlier? Yuria shrugged, it could have fallen AFTER she passed by. The storm was volatile, and the winds unpredictable.

Deciding to take another route home, Yuria detoured through the park. It was the quickest way back. All she wanted now was to curl up in her soft cozy bed.

The rapid pitter patter of footsteps on pavement was all the warning she got. Yuria ducked on instinct, hearing the whoosh of air as something narrowly missed her head. She spun around with a kick, hearing someone grunt in pain. The girl backpedaled and squinted her eyes in the dimly lit park. Oh, so it was a wooden bat that they swung at her.

THEY were of course local Yankees. But not just anyone. Yuria’s jaw tightened and her fists clenched. It was the girls associated with Yuichi’s death.

It was as if life was trying to give her a jumpstart into confronting her emotions. She had been avoiding particular thoughts and feelings for a while now. Yuria REALLY didn’t want to attempt sorting through her emotional turmoil. She was too afraid of what she might find. Of what she really felt. What she really wanted to do.

Yuria spotted movement to her right, throwing her bag of cup ramen at the attacker. The yankee grunted as it hit her square in the face, Yuria was already on the move. She punched her in the stomach, another to her face, and the yankee was sprawled on the grass.

“Still as sharp as ever huh, Peace?” A voice called out.

Yuria recognized the leader. Her name was….Mari. The girl’s hair was now dyed purple, and Yuria could make out piercings in her nose. She squared herself and the leader stepped forward to face her.

“Too bad your bro wasn’t the same.” The leader snickered.

Yuria tensed at the mention of Yuichi. Her eyes narrowed in anger, gaze zeroing in on the yankee.

“So I MAY have shoved him over the bridge. But he was the idiot. Who would meet a bunch of Yankees out there so late at night?”  Mari laughed, and her posse laughed along with her.

The sound grated against Yuria’s nerves. But she said nothing.

“Mari-san, you DID say you would leave him be after he did a favour for you.” One of the Yankees pointed out, grinning maliciously at Yuria.

“Oh yeah! I did! I was obviously lying. That pathetic weakling even asked politely to go away!” Mari snorted at the memory, before guffawing loudly as she recounted his death.

Yuria’s heart was beating loudly in her ears, her eyes wide in indignation. She could feel a fire burning in her veins, yet her hands felt cold and sweaty, her breath was becoming short and shallow.

“It was so easy! He even stood against the railing. All we had to do was surround him, and then…” The leader made a pushing motion, even mockingly imitating his scream.

‘Justice. Power. Fear. Scum. Yuichi. Love. Hope. Pain. Despair. MotherTalentLoveHope. Scum…..your fault!’ Her mind was roiling as these words kept repeating itself in her head. Like a gathering storm with angry flashes of lightning. The lightning being the impact of each thought rapidly hitting her.

It was as if an air of tension had coiled itself around Yuria’s being. So constricting, she struggled to breathe, struggled to think straight, Yuria was suffocating.

Mari’s smile was evil. So malicious and hateful on the face of someone who was plaguing this neighbourhood. Someone who had killed Yuichi. Someone who was...scum.

“Splat.” Said the scum.

Yuria snapped.

 

\---------------------------------------------------------------------

 

It had begun raining again on her way home. Just as well. She was already soaked anyway. And in the back of her head, she wondered if it would make it easier to wash off the grime she had on her.

Yuria stumbled through the door, standing by the entrance of her home as a puddle pooled around her rain boots. Her disheveled hair fell over her eyes as she stared numbly at the water at her feet. Something was wrong. She was sure of it.

Her mother had come out of the office, probably to check if Yuria had brought back food. Only to freeze.

“You….”

Yuria slowly lifted her eyes to her mother, seeing the surprise on her face somehow snapped the girl out of her shock.

“Mother…” She suddenly lost all strength, falling to her hands and knees. 

The splash of the puddle caught Yuria’s attention, and she stared at its red colour. Her eyes prickled with tears, and her breath caught in her throat. She had suddenly returned to full clarity, the full impact of what she had done crushing her.

“I….I’m so sorry…I’m sorry…I’msorryI’msorryI’msorry!” Yuria closed her eyes as she cried.

She didn’t notice her mother’s footsteps as the woman neared.

Yuria clenched her fists, hiccups hitting her from the force of her crying. Her eyes opened in surprise when her mother held her chin and lifted her head. The girl couldn’t stop her hiccups, still grossly crying as her mother searched her tear-streaked face.

“What did you do?” The woman asked, serious and deathly calm.

“I….” Her breath caught in her throat as Yuria couldn’t bring herself to say it out loud.

But her mother’s eyes narrowed, her gaze steeled against Yuria’s distress.

“Answer me!”

“I…they….I killed them….I killed them!” Yuria cried out, body shaking with fresh bouts of sobbing.

Her mother had let go, understanding immediately, and Yuria expected to be disowned, shamed, and sent into police custody. She held her head in her hands as she wept.

Staring into the rippling puddle of water mixed with blood and tears, Yuria flashed back to what happened.

_\--------------------------------------------------------------------------_

_She snapped._

_Yuria let out a roar as she leapt at the leader, the need for vengeance blocking out all rational thought. To her anger, Mari’s lackeys jumped in between them, trying to protect their leader, who retreated to a safe distance._

_But it didn’t hinder her. Rather, Yuria felt insulted. How DARE they get in between her and her quarry? These weak, worthless, bunch of garbage. They could barely even stand up against her. Mighty was Yuria’s wrath._

_The girl dodged a kick to her left, swiftly dealing a roundhouse kick of her own. She didn’t even spare a glance as the yankee fell, already punching an approaching girl in the jaw._

_She cleaved through them like butter, mercilessly targeting soft flesh and vulnerable areas. All through the chaos she kept an eye on the leader, steadily dispatching cronies and working her way closer._

_Yuria caught the fist of another yankee, and ignoring the fear on her face, she jerked the yankee forward, using the momentum to strike her in the throat. The girl fell with a strangled cry, but Yuria paid her no mind._

_To her utter annoyance, still three girls stood in between her and her target. All were eyeing her fearfully, but Yuria was so pumped up with fury and the rush of power that she didn’t notice. She only focused on Mari._

_All three girls rushed at her desperately, Yuria bent down and with a cry, literally tossed one of them over her shoulder. She vaguely registered a grunt of pain as the yankee impacted on the ground._

_Stepping back to avoid a kick, Yuria brought her arms up to protect against a barrage of punches the other two were assaulting her with. Yuria grit her teeth as they forced her back, but not in pain. She was growing impatient, this was taking too long._

_She dug her heel into the ground and pushed forward, ignoring how she was punched in the face as she tackled the one to her right. The yankee had the breath knocked out of her, trying to protect her face as Yuria mounted her and started raining blow after blow._

_The girl had no chance, Yuria actually pried an arm away and pounded her face mercilessly with a sneer._

_The friend came up behind Yuria, wrapping an arm around her throat and trying with difficulty to haul Yuria who was still kicking and struggling, off her fallen comrade._

_The yankee was surprisingly strong as she secured her hold around Yuria’s throat and one arm, locking her in place. Yuria tried to kick out, seeing the leader approach with the wooden bat from before._

_She cried in pain as Mari hit her stomach, feeling the need to bend over coughing. But she was held upright by the yankee. Yuria met Mari’s gaze with hatred, she was seething as Mari jeered down at her._

_Gritting her teeth, Yuria surprised the one restraining her with a headbutt and a follow-up elbow. Feeling her grip loosen, Yuria spun around for a devastating kick straight to the face, and the girl fell heavily to the ground._

_A flash of pain caused Yuria to stumble and scream. Mari had attacked her from behind with the bat._

_Yuria growled as rage fueled her anew, Yuichi’s kind smile flashing in her mind’s eye. Throwing caution to the wind, she dashed towards the source of her pain and despair, sidestepping to avoid a wide swing of the bat. A grunt escaped Yuria when she was surprised with a frontal kick. But it didn’t deter her. The next time Mari swung her bat, Yuria stepped inside and caught it with both hands. She never really registered the sharp shock of pain lacing up her forearms, the adrenaline had numbed her body._

_The bat was wrenched away from Mari, and with a loud incensed roar, Yuria struck her across the face._

_There was a sickening crack as Mari fell motionless, blood spraying onto Yuria. But she did not stop there._

_Yuria stood over Mari and continued striking her with the bat, screaming in rage as she let her frustrations loose._

_When she was finally done, Yuria’s body shook as she heaved deep breaths. She stared at the bloody bat, the bloodied girl at her feet, and her bloody hands._

_“What have you done?!”_

_Her gaze whipped to the beaten Yankees watching her in horror._

_She tightened her grip on the bat._

_“If you come, I’ll kill you too!” Yuria snarled._

_The Yankees charged._

_So did she._

_\--------------------------------------------------_

 

Back in the present time, Yuria was shocked out of her reverie when she felt a hand patting her head instead.

She was so surprised that her sobbing stopped for a brief moment, gaze shooting up to her mother.

The woman was smiling at her.

Yuria was so confused.

“Mother….?" 

“You finally put your talents to good use.”

Yuria was frozen as her mother continued patting her head.

“I don’t understand.” She asked quietly, voice hoarse from crying.

“Silly girl, you did a service to me. To society. Yes, I see now. With your help, we’ll rid the world of the kind of scum that killed Yuichi.” Her mother started to smile, her eyes had that maniacal gleam to them again.

“Mother, you can’t mean to…” Yuria’s eyes widened in shock, staring unbelievingly at the woman.

She was further surprised when she felt arms wrap around her, her mother was pulling her into a hug. This had never happened before.

.

.

.

.

.

This felt nice.

She started crying again, albeit for a different reason.

“Thank you. You dealt with the scum who killed Yuichi. My little Cleaner. My Peace.” Various other praises and reassurances streamed forth from the woman.

She could hardly believe it.

"You'll help me won't you?" Her mother pulled away all too soon, straightening and looking down at the daughter still kneeling before her.

"Yes, mother."

"It's Director from now on."

At that moment, the girl knew.

Peace would keep doing whatever she had to.

If only so her mother would hold her.

 

END


End file.
